The behavior of humans in the throes of pleasure deserve far more interest and inquiry than what is already available at hand. To begin with, we're odd creatures, but we get even odder when we're stimulated in any way. And to be stimulated is the very essence of the human experience.
Why does pleasure bring out strange shades of us? Well, it's just a harmless manifestation of the psychological phenomenon of intrusive thoughts, which is basically just an academic way of saying 'random thoughts cropping up where they don't belong'. So the first thing to acknowledge is that it's completely normal. When there's a consistent source of stimulation, it almost as if you're at sea or driving on a smooth highway, the mind just tends to wander.
Here is an attempt to chart out the various weird thoughts that we have during the act of cunnilingus.
#1. Thoughts About Your Plans After
"Hmmm looks like there's a new season of Jessica Jones on Netflix, should catch up on it."
"Feel like a sandwich later. Perhaps roasted peppers with garlic mayo and lettuce."
The world doesn't stop turning just because somebody is going down on you, there are things on your mind and you need to address them. The human need to plan ahead on both trivial and important matters will simply not cease.
#2. Thoughts About Your Current Situation
"Looks like he's really getting in there. This isn't fun. Has he been possessed by the spirit of a beaver?"
"Damn, when I said I liked that he took it to mean he has to be more enthusiastic and go harder and faster."
"What if his head just explodes, like right now?"
This is the most obvious line of thought, however things can and do get weird even within the confines of your current predicament. If your mind was a live feed Twitter handle, it would be a rather weird one. It doesn't help that men perform in a manner that gives us enough time to ponder over the finer aspects of the moment.
#3. The Existential Thoughts
"Is this all there is?"
"Why do we even do this? What is a moment of pleasure in the larger scheme of things?"
"Is all happiness transient?"
Underneath the facade of every normal human being lies a philosophy major. When things get hot and heavy, we sometimes find that the existential neurons in our brain fire off.
#4. The Outright Absurd Thoughts
"I wonder if they completely stretched out foreskin. How long would it go?"
"How do rice fields go from being green and grassy to becoming small pellets of rice? Where does that happen? Is it natural? Is it done in the factory?"
Absurdity courses through our veins just like anything else does. Absurdity is a joy to behold, go forth and be weird.
Written by Rheea Mukherjee. Rheea spent most of her life moving between the US and India. In 2011, she decided enough was enough and moved back to Bangalore for good where she founded Write Leela Write with her friend Kala. Rheea writes awesome blogs and other things for Lovetreats. She loves dogs, attempts yoga and fantasizes about becoming vegan. Rheea also just published her first book, "Transit For Beginners"!