Fantasizing about a one night stand? With online dating apps on the rise, it's easier than never to make it a reality. Here’s how to make casual sex memorable.
Go home with someone that you’re not desperate to see again but that you wouldn’t be horrified to run into another day. (The world is tiny. Eventually, you will run into most of your former sex partners.)
Don’t make a porno.
You know how the typical porn goes: vague groping, blowjob, penetration, 2-3 sex positions, money shot, done. Remember, you’re not collecting a paycheck at the end of this, so you don’t have to follow the script. Instead…
Do what actually gets you off.
Don’t feel like penetrative sex? That’s cool. See what your partner can do with their hands. Need a vibrator to get off? Crack it out and hand it to your new friend. Want your partner to talk dirty to you in a bad French accent? You lose nothing by asking. Then, give as good as you get. Remember: you’re both here for sex. Why not have the best sex you can possibly have?
Chill out about your boner (or boner equivalent).
Whiskey dick? Happens. Not as wet as you’d like? Lube exists. The only way your misbehaving genitals will ruin your night is if you let them. Save the existential crisis for something worth stressing about.
Know your acceptable level of risk and what you’re going to do about it.
Don’t become one of the many people Googling “i had sex with someone and now i have an itch am i going to die?” Read up on the STIs that are out there, how they’re transmitted, and what you can do to mitigate your risk, and then make informed choices ahead of time about what you’re comfortable with. You’ll have more fun if you’re not stressing out about the threat of some nebulously spooky disease.
Be a good host.
If you two end up back at your place, treat your guest like a guest. If it gets late, offer them crash space. If you split an Uber across town to get to your place, offer to split the cost of their trip home. If things get sticky (in a fun way), have a clean towel available.
Be a good person in general.
Resist the temptation to prove that you’re not clingy by being rude or dismissive. You don’t have to pour your feelings out to them (do not pour your feelings out to them), but behave in such a way that you won’t be mortified when you (inevitably! Cannot stress this enough!) run into each other again.